MEDIA CENTRE - Off The Wall

Phil’s Travels – Douala, Cameroon (09.26)

Phil’s Travels – Douala, Cameroon (09.26)

After two major National Air Traffic Services malfunctions across the UK had resulted in major disruption to flights just a day or so before my own, thankfully there were no NATS nasties on my day.

Check-in was swift, security was slow as my pull-along was pulled for a bomb check. Routine enough you might think but my bag was next in line behind another chap’s stuffed to the brim Tesco shopping bag. What was in the bulging Tesco bag? According to the security bods he had some seven mobile phones and battery packs in there and this was causing them some distress. An argument ensued. Security said only five such devices were permitted per person and wanted to remove two of them. The man objected, very vociferously, and quite rightly said he did not know this rule and that signs should be posted to advise accordingly. Security management was called and eventually he was allowed to pass with his seven machines. Some 15 minutes after submitting my pull-along I was into the world’s most boring terminal.

The Perfectionist Cafe had become a regular Bills, so, no more nominal fun in the world’s most boring terminal even from slippery poached eggs for passengers to chase across their plates and tables.

The flights to Brussels and on to Douala were not busy and hassle free. First evening in Douala we met at the K Hotel for dinner and I had my first taste of Mbongo Tchobi (an iconic, deeply aromatic, spicy black stew originating from the Bassa tribe in Cameroon). It was delicious, fragrant and very black. But not spicy at all. Maybe there are better versions to be found. I will keep searching.

Douala was very busy and the roads filled with the usual eclectic mix of vehicles: massive trucks from the docks, jalopies, motorbikes carrying everything and anything imaginable and even a Mercedes G Wagon.

Gridlocks everywhere as we drove from meeting to meeting. Maybe because the Prime Minister was in town. Police were all over the city. After the meetings we went to the site to see how the preparations were progressing. Amazing to see how barren and level it looked after all the demolition works. Only the shell of one last building remained and it was going under the jack-hammer at the time behind the voluminous marquees.

The preparations were frenetic. People rushing hither and thither. Carrying and banging. Instructing and monitoring. And yet despite all the activity, there seemed to be a mass of stuff still to do. In the end they worked through the night and in the morning the venue was ready. An elegant entrance, one marquee to the left for the presentations and one marquee to the right for the post ceremony lunch.

The Groundbreaking Ceremony (aka Pose de la Premiere Pierre in french) itself was an uber grand affair, with more than 600 invited guests, many speakers (including yours truly and the PM, naturally), a posse of press and a phalanx of photographers. The weather was perfect for a perfect ceremony. No rain and cloud cover to shield the Equatorial sun meant we did not broil too badly under the canvas.

The tribal chiefs blessed the site and the project and the PM laid the first stone. After some three hours of presentations and ceremony, 600 guests broke for lunch and enjoyed a lavish banquet. Outside, the word must have got out, as the streets were packed with entertainers, police, people seeking work and many, many cars. We managed to get away relatively cleanly.

Later that day, we gathered at the K Hotel for a debrief and celebrated an excellent day with a shared bottle of JD.

Next day I worked in my hotel room before heading to the airport to come home. The depth of work possible was limited though as there were many brief power cuts (after which the wifi took many minutes to reboot) and the internet connection was not fast (meaning downloading anything meaningful was impossible). En route to the airport, we dropped into the Onomo Hotel (my first visit) and Serenity (the most luxurious apartment block in the city).

At Douala Airport whilst waiting to board, I noticed a large number of wheelchairs heading down the Jetway to our plane. “I counted them all out and I counted them all back in” – 16 in total, all filled on the way back into the terminal. Must have been some kind of record, surely.

Note for future travel to Cameroon on Brussels Airlines: no trouble on the way out but on the way home I was challenged by a security chap with regard to the weight of my pull-along. Apparently in Premium Economy there is a weight limit of 12kg and my bags weighed a total of 17kg. I have never been stopped for such a thing before. After a debate with the Brussels rep (who tried to make me pay more to carry on my pull-along), I refused to pay his fee (revenue gouging) and checked-in my pull-along for free. Thankfully it arrived safely at T2.

At T2 on this occasion, the world’s most boring airport terminal was particularly boring. On this day it decided to have a slow luggage delivery day. Boring! I made it home early afternoon, totally exhausted, and enjoyed a rare siesta.

Whilst away many seismic events came to pass: Man City FC was found guilty of 114 transgressions and Trump hosted Xi at the White House (a shame his new ballroom was not ready yet and his arch unavailable for selfies – maybe next time).